Jake grew up with a single mum, and even as a child, he took on the role of “the man’ in the house. When his stepdad came along, things were ok for a while, but later Jake would have to endure the fear and anger of living with an unstable parent figure. Jake escaped to pursue his own life of travel and adventure and became qualified as a chef. Later, in his mid-twenties, when he was just starting to thrive in his new career as a personal trainer, a tragic motorcycle accident nearly claimed his life. Toward the end of his months of recovery, he was told he had throat cancer.

Mitch and Jake talk openly about how he survived through it all and how he is continually challenging himself to improve and pursue physical and mental health.

Topics covered:

• Feeling unsafe at home in a household where there is drugs and violence
• A sense of masculinity. How we grasp at it, lean into it and adapt to threats to it.
• Surviving a motorcycle accident, which left him in recovery for months
• Receiving a cancer diagnosis while still in rehabilitation from the accident

The music Jake mentions at the end is by @lukasmac and has been a guiding light for his recovery.

After constantly yearning for his father’s love, acceptance and approval, which never came, Sean had a longing to be seen and heard. He fought his way through a devastating revelation in childhood, and challenging teenage years to build a life worth living. Toward the end of this chat, Mitch and Sean share a deep connection and vulnerable exchange which enables Sean to open up even further and let the love in and the light shine even further out of him.

Topics covered:

• We already matter. “Success” doesn’t validate our humanity and value.
• Allocating our self-worth is an inside job.
• The humiliation of being unwanted by a parent and alienated by your family.
• How being homeless during his final year of high school drove Sean to imagine that “success” would help him escape poverty.
• No matter how polarized our demographics, anyone can show you life-changing kindness.

Mitch Wallis speaks to Tofe Evans who talks about running ultramarathons to cope with his mental health.

This episode covers:

• Fighting through adversity fuelled by drugs & alcohol abuse, driven by shame, victimisation, and identity crises.
• How a lust for external validation infected every area of his life, and left Tofe on the brink of suicide.
• Being present to keep us feeling enough and worthy of love.
• The identity crisis after pulling out 280km into a 345km ultramarathon across Scotland.

Episode support notes:

Tofe’s book is called “Everyone Has a Plan Until Sh!t Hits the Fan” available on Amazon.

Mitch Wallis speaks to Josh Wiggins, Nutritionist, Mentor & Mental Performance Coach.

Topics covered:

• The damaging effect of presenting a façade of coping: how being strong for other people removes authentic connection and can exacerbate mental ill health.
• How teenagers searching for a sense of agency over their body can fall into unhealthy habits and belief systems.
• How receiving a diagnosis can bring a sense of clarity and freedom to move on.
• The value of a mentor – how letting just one person we respect and admire guide us can be a significant turning point in our wellbeing.

Mitch Wallis speaks to Darren, whose experiences in his career as an engineer, coupled with becoming a dad, led him to pursue a new passion – to meet the need for men’s wellbeing.

This episode covers:

• How far we can push our body and brain until it shuts down.
• How shame seeded in childhood can drive us to overcompensate, achieve and succeed, and at what point that energy source become toxic.
• How being an empath and a problem solving engineer is a perfect storm of chaos in relationships.
• Recognising the power of connected communities of men.